Second Chance
by Serafim3389
Summary: Chris can't say his name and he will not say goodbye. Sometimes goodbye is a second chance, maybe he won't need to say goodbye to get it. ChrisxPiers Disclaimer: I own nothing.
1. Chapter 1

It had been over a month, and still it seemed that Chris could not get to sleep without crying. The calendar read August 14th and Lanshiang felt like yesterday. It seemed that when the sun went down, so did his fake stability. On the inside Chris was still very broken and trying his damndest to rebuild himself. Yet every since July 1st, he would lie in bed and squeeze the teddy bear that belonged to the man he loved. Chris had won the stuffed toy for him three years prior; in fact, he won it on their first actual date. Chris had taken the sniper to a festival that the entire town closed up shop to put on. There were rides and games, and Chris decided to show off and play the duck shooting game which resulted in the stuffed-bear. The younger man slept with it every night that Chris wasn't there to hold on to.

The nights always began the same way, happy memories that crept ever closer to the one night he wished he could do over. Chris felt like he never told him that he loved him enough, never held him close enough and never kissed him deep enough. He silently begged whoever was out there to let him have another chance to prove just how much he needed the other man and also to show just how much he really loved him. After a while, Chris would hug the bear tighter and smell the young sniper and become lost in it. Everything would come to a halt when he would roll over too far into that someone's spot.

Chris couldn't bring himself to speak his name out loud, maybe he thought that if he said it he would damn his boyfriend from coming back, or that meant he was really gone or… well, it was a long shot, but maybe he was saving that delightful name for when he was face to face with him again. He could say that name as much as he wanted if he got his love back because Chris knew that it wouldn't carry the weight of loss and guilt.

And like clock-work, he replayed the night with HAOS, the underwater facility and that fucking C-virus. It all happened so fast, everything was a blur, but he would never forget it.

_The sniper closed the pod door after shoving his captain and lover into the escape pod, "NO!" Chris screamed, "You can still make it out alive!" The young brunet had moved to push the launch panel. "Don't do this! There's still time!" Chris pounded and shouted while the hazel-eyed soldier stood in front of the window once again, "Open the goddamn door! That's an order!" Chris shouted again. He heard the sound of air being decompressed and new time was limited, "Please!" Tears began to burn in his eyes, "Please come with me!" The infected man put his unchanged hand against the window and Chris put his right up opposite his, "I love you, don't leave me." A single tear fell down the captain's face._

_The younger man gave Chris a soft smile, the sadness was evident in his untainted eye, before calling out, "I love you too, Chris, with all my heart!" He slowly backed away from the pod, knowing that he had sealed his own fate. "Goodbye," he mouthed, since he knew that his voice was no match for the sound of water rushing in._

Chris could never get beyond this part, the final goodbye and the last 'I love you'. His quiet crying turned to sobs. He has lost men before and he has lost a partner. He knows what loss is, he knows what death does to those that it does not take with it. Except this loss was different. This time, he lost a piece of him that died with the love of his life. In all honesty, Chris wanted to spend the rest of his life with the sniper. He could see it. He could never grow tired of him. He loved every part of the man. From head to toe he was perfect. He would get weak in the knees when he would see his boyfriend sitting at the counter reading, or the way he would give him a hug and kiss when arriving home. The way his skin felt against Chris' own drove him wild and no matter what he could never get enough. He wanted a future with him, a life. That couldn't happen now though.

After a time of sobs, Chris' tears dried and he would fall asleep, but not without the bother of a few sniffles. The soldier was glad that he couldn't sleep long enough to recall his dreams form the night before, but he longed for a good night's rest. Four or five hours would pass and he would be awake again. His eyes would snap open as if he was woken up by shattering glass. The man would start his day with the usual, start the coffee and hop in the shower.

Today though, felt different. He wasn't sure how or why, but it just did. He decided to just throw on some old clothes and walk around town for a little while. Maybe being left alone for a little too long makes you think a little too much. Chris wasn't sure where he was walking to and he didn't much care. The only thing that bothered him was how cold and empty his right hand felt. He stuffed his hands in his pockets to avoid the feeling and kept walking. He walked aimlessly for about an hour before he landed himself somewhere he didn't think he could handle.

"Shit." He scolded himself. He knew what he was getting himself into, but he kept on walking until he could picture the service that took place. Chris knew better than to believe that there was a body, but maybe they buried a casket to help everyone believe they were saying goodbye to someone. It always amazed Chris as to how we could all believe lies like that. It probably helped with letting go, so he waved away the thought. He trudged closer and closer the slab of granite with his lover's name on it. He put his hands on top of his head and sighed, "Well, I'm here babe. I'm sorry." He spoke to the stone as if it were messenger to him. He could feel his lip begin to tremble, "I never thought I'd have to come here, because I know that where you are isn't here." He took a deep breath, "but this is all I've got."

He pulled the pack of cigarettes out of his pocket and plucked one out. He put it between his lips and went to grab his lighter, but noticed it wasn't in his pockets. He shook his head and smiled, "I know you hated me smoking, and I promise I'm trying to quit." Somehow he knew that not having his lighter was some sort of sign because the younger soldier always hid the older's lighters. For the first time in a long time, Chris let out a true laugh. He laughed loud and hard. He could feel his face become red and tears come to his eyes. He finally calmed down and wiped his eyes. "I love you, you know. If I could, I would marry you. I know I should've asked before, but, you know me. Always waiting till the last second." For some reason, talking to the stone was comforting. Chris felt like his message was being sent, but he knew better deep down. It was nice to talk about these things in a place of peace though. "Have fun where ever you are… And I love you, with all my heart."

He wouldn't say goodbye to him, at least not yet. His heart still needed to mend before he could say his farewell. He needed grab on to enough of that beautiful man to hold in his memory and his heart. That was when he could say goodbye. So Chris began to walk home. He didn't walk with such a heavy foot this time, but the sun still didn't shine as bright. All of this was going to take time. 'Time heals all wounds' they say, but he didn't want to wait that long, because even though he knew he would get there, it was going to hurt like hell. He walked up the steps to his apartment building and swung open the door. Everything still looked the same, but with a little less gloom. He walked up to the fourth floor and down the hallway. Apartment 19 was where he stopped and stuck the key in the door. He pushed the door open to smell food. He turned to the right and his heart nearly stopped.

"P-Piers?"


	2. Chapter 2

Chris stood in the doorway, paralyzed by the man that turned around to face him, "Hard to find a good steak around here." When he heard his soothing voice, tears welled in his eyes. He watched as two very different hands shut off burners on opposite ends of the stove. He wanted to reach out for him and hold him again, but his knees were too weak to bend and his hands were stuck. All he could do was stand and cry at the sight of his returned love.

"Please… Please be real." He whispered to Piers. The younger man began to walk to Chris. Human skin could withstand immense stretching and countless abrasions, but the C-virus left its mark on Piers. He could see that his right hand was mostly scar tissue, but still retained its original shape. He wore a white, long-sleeve shirt to hide most of the damage, though his neck had stripes of deep, shiny pink on one side. His face was still beautiful, but it was haunted. His hair was much shorter, most likely because of surgeries and other medical procedures. Around his right eye were splotches of smooth, reflective skin. Actually looking into his eyes, Chris still felt like he would be lost in them if he looked too long. One eye was still the cheery, warm hazel, and the other had a blue iris with spots of white in it. There was nothing that could make the sniper look any less stunning in Chris' eyes. The older man was kindly startled when he felt a soft peck at his lips and arms sling around his neck. Chris slowly, but surely, lifted his arms to hold the man he loved so dearly as tight as he could without crushing him. "Please Piers, please, please, please be real."

There was a soft giggle, before there was a hitch in the breath of the young brunet, "I am, Captain." Piers hugged him tighter and cried; more so Piers finally broke down. He braved everyday in the hospital alone and if that wasn't enough, he survived three intensive, reconstructive surgeries. He faced all of it by himself and with a powerful smile. Piers was finally home and in the arms of the man that he never wanted to let go of, and could finally let himself drop the weight from his shoulders. His legs trembled and his arms were losing the will to hold on. He knew that Chris wouldn't let him fall, though. Chris held on to him tight while he buried his head into his 'teddy-bear's' chest, "I missed you so much, Chris. I'm so sorry for what I did."

"None of that matters now. You're home and you're safe." He kissed the top of his head, "And damn it I've missed you too. I haven't been able to sleep without you next to me." Chris felt Piers gain some strength back. His 'puppy' looked up to him with puffy eyes and Chris wiped away the last tear on his cheek, "I love you so much." He pressed his lips against the other's and felt a shock. He pulled away and laughed.

The look on Piers' face was terrified, "I'm so sorry." He said quietly, "I guess the virus isn't completely wiped out…" He pulled away from Chris's arms and stepped over to the cabinet beside the stove. He pulled out a couple plates and set them on the counter, "You eating, Cap?"

"Piers, babe, it was just a shock, please don't shut down." He reached a hand out and touched his shoulder. Piers shook his hand off.

The sniper began to put food on the plates. "I'm a monster, Chris." His voice was cold, "I wasn't meant to survive. I should've died at the bottom of the ocean with the rest of the C-virus." Chris could hear the shakiness, "I'm deformed and I-I scare people. The nurses were afraid to come in my room because of how I looked." Piers was a very social person, he would talk to just about anyone, so he knew how hard this hit him. Still facing away from the older man, he dropped his head and shook it, "I don't know how you can say you love me after seeing me like this." Piers gripped the sides of the stove and cried.

Chris's heart shattered. He didn't love Piers for the way looked, but for the mushy, sappy, sweet stuff and everything else that was the love of his life. He wrapped his arms around Piers' waist. The older soldier rested his head on the crying man's right shoulder. He just held him for a while. He wasn't sure when Piers' fingers entwined with his, but he was glad. That meant that he was one step closer to breaking the wall that was put up. Piers leaned back against the broad chest that he would rest his head on at night. Chris kissed the marred skin on his neck, "I love you. I would never let you go, Piers." He kissed the skin again, "You don't scare me, and therefore you are not a monster." He squeezed him tight, "You are just as beautiful to me now as you were when I met you, and you always will be. That's not going to change."

The young brunet squeezed Chris's hands, "I love you." He let go and turned around in his Captain's arms. With a soft smile he pressed his lips to the taller man's. He missed the feeling of those lips on his. Chris had strong lips that pushed back with intensity and passion. The two held onto each other and shared a heated kiss. Chris bit at Piers' lip and Piers begged for the permission he hardly needed by lightly licking at Chris's top lip. The kiss deepened by Chris allowing Piers to slither his tongue into his mouth. Piers hit every spot that drove Chris to madness. Their touches became needier, in that they both needed to be closer to each other than was possible. Chris reached down to grab the perfect ass, which he claimed as his own four years ago, and Piers' breathing hitched. Piers ran his fingers through the messy brown hair that he loved to play with at all times of the day.

A month and a half without each other had the two nearly ripping each other's clothes off. Chris slid his hands up the back of Piers' shirt; one hand felt the delicate skin that only he was allowed to feel and the other felt a new part of him that befitted the sniper. Chris paid no mind to the little tingles and shocks that bit his fingertips, but Piers was certainly bothered by it. Chris reassured him that it was still alright by kissing up his jaw and down to the electrified skin on his neck. He sucked and bit the skin and he felt Piers melting in his arms. The skin seemed to only react when his pup got surprised, because his tongue was being zapped over and over. The older man found it exciting. He had finally managed to pull off the long-sleeved barrier and took a moment to admire the younger man, "God damn it, Piers." Chris admired the contrast between his two halves. He found a beauty in what others called ugliness that was indescribable. He saw this rebuilt flesh as a reminder that anything could happen and pretty much that love is more powerful than darkness. He looked into Piers' eyes. He cupped his cheeks and rested his forehead against Piers'. Chris's puppy slung his arms around his neck, and Chris ran his fingertips down the other's chest and stomach, "You are so fuckin' beautiful." He pulled the younger man's hips to his and kissed the soft, pouty lips that had total control over him.

In Piers' mind, nothing was better than the feeling he felt when Chris looked at him. He felt safe, coveted and like all of his imperfections weren't real. Being an emotional person, Piers reveled in the little things his captain did that made him feel good enough. When his boyfriend peeled the shirt from him, he felt scared and disgusting. He wanted to run and hide, but when Chris looked him in the eyes, it was all washed away. He felt attractive, sexy, loved. He felt like he was on cloud nine and nothing could ever change it. Feeling the toughened fingers against his skin and being told he was beautiful again was the healing he truly needed.

Both men were hard and it was becoming difficult to not pull their pants off and fuck right there in the kitchen. Chris ran his hands down under Piers' ass and grabbed his strong thighs. He lifted the other man up and Piers held on. They kissed and bit each other's necks as they made their way to the bedroom. Piers noticed that the room smelled mostly of Chris now and it was intoxicating. He was gently laid down on the bed and was soon being covered with touches and Chris's lips. He couldn't help but laugh when fingers brushed against his sides. The older man smiled and swooped in for a chaste kiss before returning to the rest of his body. Piers wasn't sure when Chris lost his shirt, but he was damn excited. His hands instinctively grabbed for his chest. The feeling of warmth and the hair that coated his tanned skin against his hands felt perfect.

Usually sex was more primal for them, they'd tear each other's clothes off and fuck each other as hard they could and exhaust their bodies. This time was more sensual and careful. They both needed to take time retracing the other's body. Not that either had forgotten the other, but Chris needed make sure Piers was loved all the way through and Piers wanted make up for every night that Chris spent alone. Every kiss was laced with passion and the poison of pure love. Every touch contained fire and literal electricity. They confessed their love for each other quietly as if saying it too loud might make time continue moving forward.

Chris moved to undo Piers' jeans and pull them off. He tossed them to the floor. He stared at Piers' erection through his tight underwear. He restrained himself from ripping off the tight briefs and riding him. The older man placed his hands on Piers' thighs while he leaned down to kiss the inside of them. The sound of his boyfriend near begging with his sighs of pleasure was eccentric. He crawled back up to meet his partner's lips. Their tongues moved with each other's and both of them falling to pieces in each other's arms. Chris ground his hips against Piers so he could feel his raging hard-on. Piers slid his hands from his teddy-bear's shoulders, literally tingling the whole way down, under his sweatpants and underwear to push them down to find purchase on the round, firm ass that was his alone. Chris gasped when Piers squeezed his cheeks hard. Chris felt the rest of his clothes being shoved down further, meaning that Piers needed more. He flipped the two of them so that way he was laying down and his pup was on top. The hazel-eyed Adonis pulled the pants and underwear from Chris's legs and tossed them.

Chris's hard cock was exposed to Piers now. He removed his underwear as well and slid back onto the bed to kiss Chris. He reached to grab his captain's throbbing dick and he began to stroke it. "Piers!" Chris breathed with a shudder. The young soldier kissed his lips and down his chest. He left a trail of kisses that ultimately led to the base of Chris's cock. He used the tip of his tongue to tease the pleading man from base to tip. Piers decided he would shock his bear by taking his entire length in his mouth. Chris cried out in pleasure. The younger soldier soon found a hand on the back of his head guiding his ministrations. When he knew his captain was getting close, he let the throbbing member from his mouth and lifted Chris's legs. The older man knew what was coming, he held his own legs up and Piers got to work.

Chris couldn't contain his moaning whenever his boyfriend would rim him. He felt a finger press against his entrance and go inside him. He tensed for a second, but relaxed when he felt Piers' lips against his thigh, "Don't worry babe, I'll go slow." He kissed his thigh again and began to move his finger in and out of Chris. He noticed his captain's breath was short and quick. He curled a finger up to hit his sweet spot and the older man called out for him. After a couple minutes he had added another finger. Chris was always so damn tight, it always took forever to get him ready. While Piers geared up to add the third finger, he leaned down to kiss his love tenderly. He pressed the finger inside and Chris moaned into the kiss.

After a few more minutes of fingering and kissing, Piers grabbed the lube from the nightstand, where it always had been, and lathered enough on his dick to make it easier on Chris, he also fingered some into his partner's hole. He got into position and guided his cock to Chris's tight entrance. He slowly pushed in and Chris did his best to relax. It wasn't often that Chris would give himself to the hazel-eyed man, but he would always wait just long enough to nearly forget the initial pain. Piers knew the man under him was in pain so he leaned in for a kiss, "Tell me if you want me to stop, okay?"

The pup felt two strong lips crash into his, "Keep going." Piers kissed him once again before pushing himself in the rest of the way. He knew that when Chris would sling his arms around his shoulders that he could begin to move inside him. The older soldier did just that and Piers began to slowly rock his hips. He buried his face into the crook of his teddy-bear's neck and planted soft nips and kisses all over the sensitive skin, "God, I've missed you," Chris slowly breathed out. There was a hint of sadness and Piers kissed it all away.

Piers was not one to take sex slow, especially when he topped, but today he felt like he should savor every grind into his boyfriend. He relished in the moans that escaped Chris's mouth in between kisses. With every roll and grind into him, Piers' soldier let out noises of sheer ecstasy and it made him crazier about him. Chris was so tight and it was hard for Piers to not finish right away, but he held out. Before long, Piers' breath became erratic and he was fucking Chris a bit faster. He pushed himself as far into his lover as he could and gave in to his orgasm. The man below him kissed his neck and held him tight to his own body as Piers finished inside him, "I love you. I love you so much." Piers huffed with a smile.

Chris pressed his lips to his puppy's, "I love you too, and no, baby, I'm not going anywhere." He knew the meaning behind every sound Piers made. For a moment he forgot just how hard his cock was, but Piers hadn't. He pulled himself from Chris and was crawling between his legs and up on top of Chris. He kissed him feverishly, "I want you to fuck me senseless, Chris." He reached between them and stroked Chris's rock hard dick, "I need you so much!" He kissed him again before lifting himself up and guiding the pulsing member to his entrance.

The older soldier eased himself inside of Piers. Once totally inside, he began to fuck the sniper fiercely. Piers threw his head back in sheer pleasure and called out for the man that pummeled his prostate. Chris held onto the strong, chiseled hips that belonged to most beautiful man he ever laid eyes on and continued to give him what he wanted. He pounded into him as hard as he could to bring Piers into euphoria. He slowed down a bit when he felt lips tingling against his neck. Chris felt hips grinding against his own rhythm. Piers kept moaning and calling out for Chris. He picked up the pace and was soon fucking him harder than he ever had. The sounds of ecstasy coming from the younger man made it impossible for Chris to hold out. He pushed his cock as deep as he could inside of his boyfriend and pulled him close to his chest. He rode out his orgasm with Piers whispering sweet nothings into his ear.

"Fuck, I love you." Chris looked at Piers as he collapsed on top of him, spent. He rubbed the tired soldier's back and kissed his forehead.

Piers shifted himself so there was no longer a softening dick inside him, "You do, huh?" He looked into the gorgeous eyes that made him feel at home with a smile on his face, "I love you too." He wasn't sure if the man below him would ever truly know just how much he really did love him. It seemed that every moment that passed when they spent time together, their souls became even more tangled together. At least, Piers felt that way. He leaned down to capture the strong lips that nearly bruised his own with a kiss that conveyed his emotions.

Chris's facial expressions softened and broke to light smile, "Yeah. I do." He pecked the tip of Piers' nose and wrapped him tight in his arms, "Always."

Piers closed his eyes, but not to sleep, he went back to a time when he couldn't feel himself sending electricity into his boyfriend's body. He remembered when he first met his captain, being so nervous in that office during the interview. He was even more nervous a couple months later when he decided he wanted to ask his superior to coffee. He smiled as he nestled into the crook of the older man's chest. Even his own memories crept closer and closer to Lanshiang. He remembered when Claire came to visit not long after they moved in together. She fell in love with him. She kept thanking him over and over for how happy he made Chris. The next year, he took Chris to visit his parents in Nebraska. When they first arrived, he only told them that Chris was his captain and having returned from a long mission, he needed a place to stay. The night before the two left, Piers told his parents about their relationship. His parents took it much better than he expected.

Then Edonia happened and he lost the man he loved for a time. He never stopped fighting for him. It was hard; it still hurt to remember when Chris first said he had no idea who he was. That was when the tears filled his eyes and he was soon crying again, "Piers? Babe?" The sniper sighed and wiped his tears before they could collect on the warm skin below his cheek, "Where'd you go?" Chris quietly asked.

"I'm sorry, I just- um, I was remembering." He crawled over Chris and off the bed, "I'm just gonna go take a shower, alright?" He leaned down to give the confused man a chaste kiss. He walked toward the bathroom door, "I just need minute, alright?" He looked down, "The doctors told me that being home and seeing you again would be a huge stress for my brain and now I know what they meant. I just need to take it a little slower so I can enjoy coming home to you."

Chris could only look back with sad eyes, "Okay, I'll be right out here when you come out."

Piers shut the door behind him and turned the water on. He made it good and hot, he wanted it hot enough to burn so that way if he was sleeping he would wake up. He stepped in and closed the curtain, the water soaking his body and proving his reality to be real. Being home was incredible and he never expected to be back, but still needed to slow down just so that way-

The water got cold and everything went black. He felt his body seize and hit the floor.

**Author's Note:** Hey guys! Thank you for reading, leave a review and let me know what you guys think!


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